There is a plague in the world and it threatens to engulf the minds of the stupid. There is a virus in the world and it threatens to consume the souls of the wicked. There is an infection in the world and it threatens to infect the empty coconut heads of the pathetic!
And what is this infection called? This bubonic plague? This fever? This ague? Satellite (fucking) television! (excuse my Francaise). It seeps into the homes of the proletariat masses through satellite dishes that point to the skies. Images, sermons, Bollywood wickedness, Lollywood silliness and all manner of material is beamed down at the speed of light into the innocent eyes and ears of unsuspecting folk. There is a particularly dangerous breed of programme that promulgates brain-numbing rubbish that masquerades as 'educational television' on some of the so called 'Asian Channels'. I was watching one particular programme today (which I happened to mistakenly land upon by an ill-judged press of the remote control button). Confused 'Daad Mohamed' from somewhere in the US sends his dilemma to an Islamic guidance 'expert' through whom Allah (god) apparently communicates his orders. I paraphrase Daad Mohamed's frantic appeal for clarity: His children watch cartoons, and have stuffed toys, quilts and pillow cases with Mickey Mouse on them. Is all that halal? Is it 'allowed' he wonders? Is it forbidden? Now I admit, many of us detest the addictive and manipulative Disney brand which targets young children. But this fully grown, procreative adult cannot trust his own mind and his own reason and instead seeks instructions from voices of authority. How stupid is that?
Actually, it's not stupid. It's rather scary...
These global satellite channels literally control people. They push through Maoist 'cleansing'. Miserable mullahs are closing down the Muslim mind and the Muslim heart the world over. Meanwhile 'true believers' desperately seek enslavement and thank their enslavers. The questions posed are startling in their naiveté. May we sing? Is it OK for a man to listen to a woman singer? Do I watch a female newsreader? Yes, says a wise bearded one of the 'Apna Channel' – as long as she is properly covered up and not wearing perfume. What a fucking troglodyte. Go crawl back into the primitive slime from whence you belong Troglodyte moron.
Oooooh it gets me so angry (can you tell?!). It gets my blood boiling. Urrrrrghhhhh! - It gets my nerves a-jangling.
Please don't laugh. It is tragic, not funny. I am about to cry. Honest I am. My heart is about to burst. It really is.
Somehow in the last decade or so, millions of believers have been persuaded that they are repositories and godowns of sin because they watch films, love music and paintings, read books, experience temporal pleasures and ecstasies. Muslim children are now programmed to obey – robbed of imagination, independent thought and refinement. UK Muslim parents are increasingly coming out against school visits, music and drama, novels, exercise, scientific facts. Teachers know these parental demands leave Muslim children under-educated and emotionally numbed, socially inept, academically marginalised, economically disadvantaged, rendered unresponsive to artistic words, sights, sounds and hues. There is a whole world out there to discover and learn about! But no! We'd rather live in a vacuum tube!
This is a travesty of Islamic history, its love of truth and beauty, the intellectual energy that throughout history uplifted Muslim civilisations. The current Science Museum exhibition of Muslim inventions that shaped the modern world proves Muslims were never the barbarians promoted in Western demonology. Some of the earliest manuals on surgery and optics, astronomy and flying machines came out of Muslim regions. And those same places were creative hubs producing great works of art, incredible buildings and intricate crafts.
The Pakistani blogger Raza Rumi writes: 'Who are these butchers of culture? What religion do they follow? They have no religion except barbarism.' - Yes, they are a bunch of troglodytes. Many sagacious websites will warn that mixing with people like us (i.e. people like me), freethinkers, beatniks, coolfroods, is definitely haram (a sin). I have only one thing to say: Troglodytes!
An artist and a Muslim I know put it thus beautifully: 'Allah gave me my mind, my hands my eyes, my patience, my selfhood. I use all these gifts and show people the wonders of the world. How can that be wrong? Does God want us to be deaf, stupid and blind?'
No, but God's army sure does.
Beware of the beams that penetrate thy satellite dishes and infect the minds of thy young. Beware the baritone booming of the bearded troglodytes! They want to take your mind and infect it with a robotic soul. Beware! Beware my friends! Much better and wise to throw away the dish and chuck away the remote control, and spend your evenings staring at the stars instead - just like me. Though it can be difficult to see the stars in LondonTown's light polluted skies. But one can at least try and imagine.
And imaginings all you need really.
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